About a year ago I decided that I could do a little more. I started volunteering at local schools and read to children in Pre-K 4 from low income areas. This experience has been extremely gratifying and provided me with so much perspective. Where many of us are so focused on achievements and accolades, I realize that I may be the only person outside of their teacher who reads to these children. Many of the children are still grasping the English language and likely have parents who don’t speak English and probably work to makes ends meet. Both my children were reading at Pre-K 4 and not just sight words but complete books with storylines and developing characters. I would grow concerned if I didn’t see major improvement from one month to the next. Meanwhile, the children I read to are still trying to get a handle of the alphabet forget phonetic sounds. I work really hard with them on learning how to write their names and see how proud they are when they do it. There is one child in particular, Ariana, who every week when I leave she gives me a giant bear hug, tells me she will miss me, and Thank You. It is amazing how powerful those words are. I feel that I am the one who needs to be thankful. I remind her that I will be back the following week and that I want her to keep working on the things we learned. So although I give them just an hour a week of extra help I leave with so much more.
This experience has taught me to not focus on the end result but rather the process. There is a wonderful book and Ted Talk regarding Growth Mindset by Carol Dweck (@caroldweck), who is a professor of Psychology at Stanford University. She emphasizes the importance of understanding “Not Yet”. I have really taken this to heart and tell my children when they have not mastered a skill, that they have not mastered it yet. The same holds true for the children I read to every week. If they learn anything from me I hope it is that they are just as capable and have the potential to reach any goal so long as they continue asking questions and work on the process of improvement. For the time being, I too continue to strive to improve to be a better person. So maybe I am not be where I need to be, or at least “not yet”, but I am on my way.